Like me you may wonder how you did not know that betrayal lived right beneath your nose.

It is a reasonable question.

Why didn’t I know? How did I miss the signs? What could I have done differently?

Second-guessing myself became a perpetual thought process in the aftermath. I wanted to understand how adultery happened even while I blissfully believed I had a great marriage, great sex life, and great family.

One word answers this conundrum…TRUST!

I trusted.

You trusted.

The institution of marriage should be based on trust. Business partnerships are birthed out of mutual trust. A child is meant to trust a parent. Friendship is not friendship without trust.

Regardless of how you were betrayed...one thing we all share in common, is that we trusted. But if we take trust out of the equation of our life, what do we have?

• Welcome to fear and paranoia.
• Welcome to a lonely existence.
• Welcome to a life without joy.

So don’t begrudge this very necessary element of human relationship—trust.

Instead, hold your head high. Glory in the fact you did trust and pray that you will learn to trust again.

Though your spirit may scream through tear-drenched days..."I will never trust again, for it hurts too much." I get that, I understand...as you clearly read in Mondays journal entry.

I processed the same way you are, but finally had to consider the dismal alternatives?? At the risk of sounding redundant, I repeat for emphasis...

• Welcome to fear and paranoia.
• Welcome to a lonely existence.
• Welcome to a life without joy.

Rebuilding trust after betrayal is essential but a topic for another day. For today, please believe that God is proud of the fact you loved enough to trust. He desires to heal the brokenness within and restore wholeness. You will not always feel as you do today.

We begin by placing this question “HOW DID I NOT KNOW?” to rest. The problem was not in the trusting itself, but in the breaking of such beautiful trust.

Does it help to know that others understand your pain and have found a way through?

Yes, I believe it does.

I held onto the fact Jesus not only understood, but also lived through betrayal. His most trusted disciples scattered into the black of night as soldiers hauled Him away. (John 18). Yet, He carried the cross up that hill and exemplified a trust in His Father’s plan, even when Jesus fully understood this plan included His death.

My prayer for you this day…

May the Jesus who understands your suffering, hold you close to His heart and strengthen you.

Just as Spring emerges from the bleakness of Winter, and apple blossoms unfold on a dormant branch, may you have hope to trust not only your decisions but also those around you... even if you cannot trust today.

In conclusion...Start the process of rebuilding trust with this first step forward. Do not regret that you trusted, and pray specifically that God begins to heal that broken place of mistrust within you. In blogs to come, I will further the process of how to restore a life rich in trust and joy.