I'm Fine, Your Fine, Everyone's Fine - Yeah Right!
When Clouds Roll In - When Life is Hard...
The other day at work I generically threw out my token, how are you today?“I hate that question.” The customer barked.
One look told me he was not joking.
In that moment I was given the opportunity to react in one of two ways:
One, determine that he was a grouch and make a quick exit or…
Read between the lines and realize there was far more to his story than mere grumpiness.
So I stopped and looked directly at him.
“I’ve been there.” I nodded. “I’ve had a season in my life when I hated that question too.”
Just that one comforting sentence made all the difference. His whole countenance changed. He went from exuding anger to a place of honest vulnerability.
His eyes flickered away, as he tried to disguise the tears that surfaced.
“I’ve had a real long string of bad luck,” he offered. “So you’re not going to get a proverbial “fine” out of me.”
“That’s okay” I said, “I prefer honesty any day.”
A reluctant smile stretched ever so briefly across his face.
This incident brought back the pain, the sorrow, the acute loneliness I felt in the midst of my darkest season of life. I too hated anyone to ask me how I was. I felt like a player in a grand masquerade every time I said I was fine.
There was nothing fine about my life.
Betrayal brought instability, insecurity, and the inability to lie to myself or anyone else.
If you find your life in a place of struggle, I offer a small piece of advice from someone who has been there. Do not deny your pain. It’s okay to NOT have it all together. It’s okay to be vulnerable and allow your pain a voice. Yes, you may have to choose an appropriate time and place to grieve, but allow that time daily. This means, find a place you can cry, scream, and let the pain out where you do not have to answer to anyone.
In Friday’s blog I will continue on the same theme on why and how to effectively grieve.
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About the author
Blossom Turner is an award-winning novelist, and a free-lance writer published in Chicken Soup and Kernels of Hope anthologies, and former newspaper columnist on health and fitness. A Word Guild semi-finalist for Anna's Secret, Katherine's Arrangement, Amelia’s Heartsong, and a Word Guild winner for Best Romance for Lucinda’s Defender. She has found her home in the writing of historical fiction but is open to wherever God leads. The many 5-star reviews attest to the power of love and romance authentically woven into the Shenandoah Bride Series about five sisters and their five love stories.
Blossom lives in British Columbia, Canada, with her husband, David, of forty years and their dog Lacey named after Lacey Spring, Virginia, where this series takes place. A former businesswoman, personal trainer, and mother of two grown children she is now pursuing her lifelong dream of writing full-time. A hopeless romantic at heart, she believes all story should give the reader significant entertainment value. However, her writing embodies the struggles of real life. She infuses the reality of suffering with the hope of Christ to give a healthy dose of relatable encouragement to her reader. Her desire is to leave the reader with a yearning to live for Christ on a deeper level, or at the very least, create a hunger to seek for more.
Co-author Suzie Zanewhich
Suzie is a certified life coach, leader of emotional health, and resource specialist. She has found her niche as a soul coach.
Suzie finds purpose in empowering individuals to move towards growth, healing, and alignment with their authentic self. Suzie is driven by a calling to live authentically, as the person God created her to be, to reach her fullest potential and lead others to do the same. Her passion is to help others find meaning through discovering their strengths, gifts, personality, temperament and core values.
Suzie is a life-long learner, continuously immersing herself in new courses to learn more about human behaviour, relationships, psychology, child development, emotions, trauma and healing. Because of her craving to always learn more she has earned the title of resource specialist in the area of self-discovery.
Suzie Zanewich lives with her husband in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. She has a patchwork family of four grown children, two daughters, two sons and three granddaughters.
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