IS GOD ONLY A GOD OF BLESSING or DOES GOD ALLOW PAIN ? Part 8
GOD’S SOVEREIGNTY
During my time in Australia, God supplied a stress free rest filled with relaxation and daily provision. He coupled this with honing in on my faith and trust in Him. I had been a Christian for over thirty-three years and yet I questioned His very sovereignty. Did God only have the right to bring my life blessing and not pain? “See now that I myself am He! There is no God besides me. I put to death and I bring to life, I have wounded and I will heal.” Deuteronomy 32:3 Working out God’s rightful place of sovereignty was crucial to trusting Him and He knew I grappled with this concept.
JOURNAL ENTRY
February 2009
As a teen I prayed about whom I should marry. God not only brought David into my life, but also told me to marry him. I remember that day like it was yesterday because this kind of spiritual interaction did not happen often. Driving down the highway talking to God, His directive to marry David was as clear as any conversation between two people.
So either I’m a bona fide nut cake, or the omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent, God ordered the pages of my life into a storybook from hell. This is not a fairy tale, but a scary tale.
He keeps asking me if I trust Him. As I avoid the question, scriptures pop off the page and challenge me.
“ I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along familiar paths I will guide them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them.” Isaiah 42:16
I feel blind, and the path so rough—but God you have not forsaken me, of that I’m sure.
“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.” Isaiah 43:18-19
God I want to heal because dwelling in the past is poison to my soul, but I’m in the desert—the wasteland—dust clouds my vision.
Faith, simply put, is trust in God—in His ways, not my ways. When I truly dissect my heart, do I trust God? Do I believe in His providence, His promises, His love? Do I trust His methodologies and timetable? Do I live Hebrews 11, knowing without faith it is impossible to please God?
My answer is no—I have whined and complained, I have screamed and yelled, I have demanded to know where my prayers went, or what purpose they served. I have trusted in a good God with blessings, but not a sovereign God who allows pain.
I’m up against a wall, hedged in, pressed and tried—I’m found lacking.
~ ~ ~
Next week the subject of God's sovereignty continues.
What if God allowed the pain of adultery in my life, with your healing in mind. Would that be fair? Would that be love? Would that be acceptable?
If you had asked me this question when I was writing the above journal entry, I would have screamed NO, but today, my answer is yes!
Why?
Because God heals the broken-hearted and sets the captive free. My story is where God wants to take your story, into the promised land of healing. God knew many men and women would fail in the arena of faithfulness. He knew there would be many broken-hearted. He knew and knows that healing is possible. I am living proof, that by His grace, His power, His strength, His word is truth and you can depend upon the hope of healing and a bright future.
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About the author
Blossom Turner is an award-winning novelist, and a free-lance writer published in Chicken Soup and Kernels of Hope anthologies, and former newspaper columnist on health and fitness. A Word Guild semi-finalist for Anna's Secret, Katherine's Arrangement, Amelia’s Heartsong, and a Word Guild winner for Best Romance for Lucinda’s Defender. She has found her home in the writing of historical fiction but is open to wherever God leads. The many 5-star reviews attest to the power of love and romance authentically woven into the Shenandoah Bride Series about five sisters and their five love stories.
Blossom lives in British Columbia, Canada, with her husband, David, of forty years and their dog Lacey named after Lacey Spring, Virginia, where this series takes place. A former businesswoman, personal trainer, and mother of two grown children she is now pursuing her lifelong dream of writing full-time. A hopeless romantic at heart, she believes all story should give the reader significant entertainment value. However, her writing embodies the struggles of real life. She infuses the reality of suffering with the hope of Christ to give a healthy dose of relatable encouragement to her reader. Her desire is to leave the reader with a yearning to live for Christ on a deeper level, or at the very least, create a hunger to seek for more.
Co-author Suzie Zanewhich
Suzie is a certified life coach, leader of emotional health, and resource specialist. She has found her niche as a soul coach.
Suzie finds purpose in empowering individuals to move towards growth, healing, and alignment with their authentic self. Suzie is driven by a calling to live authentically, as the person God created her to be, to reach her fullest potential and lead others to do the same. Her passion is to help others find meaning through discovering their strengths, gifts, personality, temperament and core values.
Suzie is a life-long learner, continuously immersing herself in new courses to learn more about human behaviour, relationships, psychology, child development, emotions, trauma and healing. Because of her craving to always learn more she has earned the title of resource specialist in the area of self-discovery.
Suzie Zanewich lives with her husband in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. She has a patchwork family of four grown children, two daughters, two sons and three granddaughters.
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